Planning to go see a movie for date night on Valentine’s Day but don’t want to cave into watching a total chick flick? If you are, This Means War starring Rees Witherspoon, Chris Pine, Tom Hardy and Chelsea Handler opens on Valentine’s Day, and might be a good choice for couples looking for a film light on the campy romance and heavy on the artillery.
In this sappy, romantic-action comedy, the romance centers around Lauren (Rees Witherspoon), a desperately single, corporate executive looking for a guy. And apparently any guy will do — egged on by her BFF, Trish (Chelsea Handler), she places herself on the meat market by joining a dating website.
Enter a couple of trigger happy, CIA chums, FDR Foster (Chris Pine) and Tuck (Tom Hardy) who inadvertently set up dates with the same girl. This leads the tight associates to a friendly and virile competition until mayhem ensues after one of them breaks the game rules by bedding the blond bombshell.
You’ve likely heard about a memorable counter scene in the press junkets regarding The Water for Elephants leading lady. This particular scene involves the very svelte Witherspoon (a mother of two in real life) stripping down to her small and frilly underwear with the hunk du jour rolling on the cold, kitchen granite. Not to spoil the movie (spoiler alert!), but this is about as steamy as this film gets — unless you find Handler in her flannels something to get excited about.
After a quite a few violent-but-funny rounds between the two macho palls, the girl in the middle realizes she’s been played and has to make a choice and, well, you may not be so surprised with her pick.
One thing that is surprising, is the extent of the bro-mance going on between the two brawny friends who fight until the bitter end to get the girl; one has a distinctly chiseled body while the other has those big, blue, melt-your-heart eyes. By the way, the intense locking of big, blue eyes throughout the film is gripping if you allow yourself to fixate on this; then again it’s rather hard to avoid being hypnotized by Pine and Witherspoon’s ice blues.
The combiantion of smooth talking, heat-packing agents looking for romance is somewhat endearing. However, the guns, ammunition and Federal spying equipment used to capture the dating subject may make you want to get a larger tax refund after seeing the way the CIA goons in this film use the gear our hard-earned money supposedly buys them.
Though the story line of this film is quite predictable, the action, the muscles and easy-on-the-eyes Witherspoon coupled with the comedic tone supplied by Chelsea Handler make this film (barley) bearable.
Rated PG-13
Run-time 98 minutes
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